Spartan Fist Trailer and Impressions

Every now and again, a game comes along and reminds you of one really important fact: video games are dumb sometimes, and that’s okay. Honestly, when was the last time a game let you punch someone into pieces? When was the last time a game juxtaposed extreme gore with an endearing art style….that wasn’t trying to traumatize  players with a gut punch of an ending (looking at you Hotline Miami)? I do kind of wish the trailer showed us a bit more of what too actually expect from the game, but as an introduction it works well enough.

Fez is releasing on Mobile

Five years after it was released, Fez is coming to Mobile devises sometime this year. This is pretty surprising given how Phill Fish….less than gracefully left the gaming scene, to put it nicely. With this and the fact that he released a patch for the game around this time last year as well, maybe we’re seeing his reemergence, maybe enough time as past and Fish has been able to calm down. I hope so, becuase i really enjoyed Fez and the idea that we wont get another game form it’s creator, whatever you think of him, is kind of a shame to me. Or maybe he’s late on a car payment and is doing this for the cash, i don’t know, but i choose to be an optimist.

What The Fuck Sony: Everything Trailer and Impressions

A few months ago Sony shocked the world by promoting “Life of Black Tiger” and “Skylight Freerange 2” on the official PlayStation YouTube as well as access to the PlayStation  store. These were not just bad games, these were “never to be finished steam early access” bad. I don’t know why Sony gave these games the attention they did, but the only reasonable assumption i can make is that the creators had some dirt on Sony CEO Kaz Hirai that he was desperate not to let get out. If so, those two must have let something slip becuase here we are again, asking “what the fuck sony” as an unbelievably bad trailer for an even worse looking game gets featured.

To Everything’s credit, it is more ambitious than those other two crimes against nature. The ability to zoom from the molecular level to a galactic one is, admittedly, an interesting concept. On top of that, the idea that it all matters, that a grander or more complex scope isn’t inherently more important, that’s something i can get behind. But then the gameplay starts and all i can say is “what the fuck sony?”

Did all the games budget go into that pompous voice over? Did the dev team thing ambition meant they didn’t need to do some basic fucking animation? I mean….the animals just fucking role around. I got more fluid movement out of little wooden animal figurines as a child than these guys got with modern technology.

And the trailer just….keeps….going. This motherfucker is over 10 minuets long. 10 minuets of pseudointellectual rambling and awkward gameplay.

I can really only see two good reasons as to why this trailer even exists: the game is not ready to be shown but something had to get pushed out, or the PR team fundamentally does not know how to properly market it. Then there is the potability that this is exactly what the game is like, this is exactly how the team behind it wanted you to first experiences it and whoever runs the PlayStation YouTube took a big hit of “everything” and said “yup, that looks like a quality product we want to promote.”


Huntdown Trailer and Impressions

My knowledge of shoot-em-ups pretty much begins and ends with the original Contra. I’ve never made a point of avoiding the genre i just never had much of an excuse to get into it. I started my gaming life well after side scrolling was the norm and have found few games, retro or otherwise, to be available to me. But you know what i do know pretty well? Something i do have an affinity for that this game capitalists on? The 1979 film The Warriors and Cyberpunk. Mash those two things up and you get Huntdown. And this works just as well as that idea seems. Each gang has a clear identity that could make for interesting shake-ups the the formula, and…while i hate the idea that the game might endorse police overeach the way poorly thought out cyberpunk can….i do kind of want to take the giant rocket wielding police robot out for a spin. I mean, if that’s not this games version of the tank from Metal Slug, then what’s even the point?

Graveyard Keeper Trailer and Impressions

I got an email about this today while i was at school and was unable to check out the trailer. I went onto Twitter between classes and my friend Nelson was singing it’s praise. So all day i’ve been waiting to set down and see what all the fuss was about, every hour the anticipation growing. And i am not disappointed.

For the most part.

Everything that matters has me excited: the game looks fantastic, has a great core concept and seems like it’s going to be a goddamn riot. Bur dear god, i hope they get another voice actor. Whoever they’ve got does certainly have good timing, but his voice just does not work here. I know this may seem petty, but if i have to go through an entire game listening to that voice, i don’t think i’d be able to make it through. That would be a shame, becuase the looks like a game i am going to want to spend a lot of time with.

Mothergunship Trailer and Impressions

Can….can you be sexually attracted to a video game? Not a video game character, just the game as a whole. Shit, when i made “Ludophile” a part of my url i didn’t think it would end up being literal. Jokes aside, this looks right up my ally. I never did play Tower of Guns to my great disappointment, and watching this just brought back the yearning i had for it. Plus, with Doom coming back and showing everyone how much fun old shooters can be, its nice seeing the indie scene trying their hands at FPS’s too. Sure this is taking a lot of cues from Bullet Hell shooters, but that’s the great thing about indie games: you get to experiment with genres more freely that AAA games can. And honestly, i’m stoked to see if this works as well as it looks.

Typoman: Revised Trailer and Impressions

With the subheading “Revised” i’m going to assume this is the second or so game in their series. If that is the case: shame on you reader. Shame on you from not bringing this to my attention sooner. I mean, yeah i should be way more diligent in a field i hope to work in someday and probably should have already known about this. But clearly this is your fault becuase i couldn’t be that bad at my job to not have already known this existed. Right? Moving on before i have another extensional crisis….

Typoman: Revised is a game about words, and as i lover of words i kind of love that idea. Sure it looks like it’ll be a breeze for anyone who passed 5th grade, but with the tone and art style, i think that’ll be enough to make this worth checking out. That tone and style has also endured the game somewhat too me as well. And you know what i really like? The tone and aesthetics hearken back to a day when children’s entertainment wasn’t afraid to scare the little shits. There’s a scene near the end where an enemy looks like it’s about to rip off HERO’s head, and it looks freaking gruesome….well, as gruesome as word on word violence can be, but still. It’s like when you think about how Stranger Things would have been a kids movie back in the 80’s, and how little material like that is missing now a days. And i think i’m starting to ramble. Anywyas, looks good, want to give Typoman a spin. How about you?